Renegade Unknown
by Technicolor Girl
Summary: He was a disgrace. Never was she to speak to him if not insulting him. But when a secret friendship formed in the dark, she had sealed her fate unknowingly. She went against all she had ever known. Pandora Dolohov met Sirius Black.


_Burst into passion like a tidal wave. From top to bottom, red and purple and swirling. You had me warped like old silver, rainbows born from time. And my teeth ached from the world that had simply passed through my vision; you pulled back my eyelashes like butterfly wings. No, no, you kidnapped me. Thief of hearts, unlocking cages and bars and something airy slipped through the air. I saw my soul with you. _

I stood, forging patience, beside my parents and two brothers, Antonin and Nahilus. The sound of the doorbell ringing echoed in my ears, soon joined by the click, click, click of Mrs. Black's fine, French heels. The noise was intimidating, powerful.

I had been taught from an early age to admire Mrs. Black. She was a role model for all young women in pureblood families; of course, there were always those that didn't recognize the fact. Though, nobody could deny that Mrs. Black was rather remarkable, reaching into your soul like dark poetry. Yet, on the other hand, no one expected any less of her.

The Black family was highly respectable, but we all knew there had been more and more bad eggs in that family as the years accumulated. There was Andromeda, Alphard, and who would have known that the Weasleys were possibly distant relations? Even Mrs. Black's own son had disgraced the family name; Sirius, the eldest child, had chosen to break ties with his own family.

None of us were foolish enough to bring up these minor snags in the tapestry. We all knew that though the Black family could (and to some people's opinion, should) have been banished from our world, they had the power to destroy everything that your own family had spent years building up to be what it stood as now. A dark hurricane, the Blacks were untamable, and I had come to think that maybe that was why the family had always seemed to generate so many rebels.

Now, having arrived in the parlor of the Black mansion, the usual greetings were exchanged. Oh, how I hated to curtsy. I did as I had been taught, though, and refrained easily from causing a dispute between the families. We were the third party to arrive; the Rosiers were in the sitting room, chatting with the Lestrange family, and I could hear the Malfoys bickering at the door, behind us.

I used to love these gatherings when I was younger; oh, how I had looked forward to them. Occurring about once a month, it was the only chance I ever got to visit with Bellatrix and Narcissa, Mr. and Mrs. Black's nieces, who were always such lovely girls. They were very friendly, and we had always gotten along rather well.

I never quite understood where the two girls' parents were all of the time, though. I was aware that though Bellatrix and Narcissa were Blacks, that they were not in the immediate family of the Mr. and Mrs. Black that I respected so greatly. But I knew very well, from experience, that if I were to be a decent pureblood witch, then I would know better than to ask such questions.

Previously my favorite part of the evening, my entire body was now filled with dread. Lingering, small talk, and all those other things I used to be good at. Just about every voice in the room seemed pretentious - and they were. All I wanted at that moment was to go, leave, get away from all these people, this entire world.

It was a sudden thought - so sudden, in fact, that for a moment, I frightened myself. What was I turning into? And so, immediately, I tossed the thought away as if I were just a common house-elf, emptying the week's trash.

Reassuring myself that it had all been only a fluke, I turned to face Mrs. Black with a smile as she addressed me. "Why, Pandora! Aren't you looking absolutely lovely this evening?"

"As are you, Mrs. Black."

She turned to my mother and spoke in a hushed voice, "Very nice. Perfect blend of respect for her elders and confidence. None of that dreadful modesty. You've raised her well."

I watched my mother glowing with pride, not even trying to hide it. I loved to make her proud; I loved my mother, I really did.

Suddenly, the sound of fine china shattering on a marble floor could be heard. Mrs. Black glanced toward the kitchen door, masking her embarrassment with humbleness. The idea stunned me somewhat, for Mrs. Black was one of the least humble people I knew.

"There's a new house-elf, you see. Still in training…" Her voice trailed off in the direction of the kitchen, as did her entire body. "I'll just see if everything's in order, then."

As soon as she entered the kitchen, all noises faltered, and you could almost feel the house-elves shaking the floor as they cowered beneath her. We waited for her return, all of us attempting to appear patient, though we all knew that not a single one of us truly was. Eventually, Mrs. Black joined us again, with one last comment to a rather stunned-looking house-elf, "Keep an eye on him, Kreacher. I've told you far too many times.

He nodded quickly, half looking frightened and half looking amazed, "Yes, Madam. Kreacher is much sorry, Madam."

"Then take care of it. Now." Then he was dismissed with a wave of her hand. "So sorry, everyone. Now, let me return to being a proper hostess, hopefully this time, without interruption."

A few apprehensive smiles appeared across the room with this statement, but overall, everyone felt much more reassured.

The night continued rather uneventfully, and before I knew it, the stars were quietly persuading everyone to go home. The breeze was blowing lightly, and it felt like a storm would be coming soon. I could already hear my mother, in my mind, complaining about such indecent traveling conditions. I, on the other hand, thought it was beautiful - my favorite kind of weather, really.

I was waiting outside for my family, near the portkey we would be using to return to the Dolohov Estate. I was thankful that they had allowed me to wait outside; I really needed some fresh air, though I wasn't quite sure why. They were taking quite a long time anyway, but it was not unexpected. They always lingered as long as possible when at the Black's. I suppose they were trying to absorb their elegance by breathing as much of their air as possible.

I really never knew why, honestly. It wasn't as if we weren't a decent family ourselves, even a bit noble, you could say. Then, of course, you could never get any nobler than the Blacks. It was a pitiful ranking in some aspects, but that was how it had always been. Who would have ever dared to change it?

It was rather sudden - as many things always were with him, I would come to know - the profanity, ringing clear as a bell. My heart jumped, surprised, and I looked up toward the sky, where a window's navy blue curtain was billowing in the wind.

"I said to get out! Get the hell out! Mother and her God damned spies…"

I wondered vaguely if it were he, the boy who no one ever saw, the boy who was a disgrace. I came to the estimated conclusion that it must be. Who else deserved to have spies sent on him by his own mother?

I scowled at the thought of this boy, of this Sirius, who was so ungrateful. His family was one of the most reputable wizarding families in all of England. He could have done anything; he could have been anything. That's when I realized it - that's exactly what he did. He did anything he wanted. Nonetheless, I found the idea to be disgusting, to desert one's family for the most ridiculous of reasons.

I came to find out that the "spies" never did leave him alone, and the blasphemy continued. Concerned with what my punishment may be if I were to shout at such an hour, I was hesitant to quiet him from my place on the ground. Finally, convinced that my family would certainly be a bit longer and even slightly jealous that he was shouting while I was not, I gave in to my instincts.

Raising my face toward the curtain that billowed once again, I hollered, "Will you please be quiet!"

Expecting him to follow my command, I was shocked at his answer, "No, I will not be quiet for you!"

Unaccustomed to being disobeyed, I could not think of a single word to say. I think that possibly, despite how he had acted previously, he became just a bit worried that I had not retorted. "You are still down there, aren't you?"

I should have thought of something clever and witty, but alas, I didn't have the energy, "Yes, I am."

"Well… are you spying on me, as well?"

"What are you saying?"

"I'm not saying; I'm asking. So, are you spying on me or not?"

"Honestly, I have better things to do than listen to you go about your business."

"Typical. So you are spying on me."

"Did you even listen to a word I just said?"

"If you don't mind (which I'm sure you won't), could you tell my mother that I have more important things to do than playing mind games with a spy of hers?"

Before I could respond, Sirius was once again shouting at the "spies" his mother had sent, I not being one of them. "Hey! Put that down! Get over here, put that down, and then get out of my bedroom! I'm supposed to at least have one room in this dungeon to myself!"

I started to stand up, figuring that it was about time to head back inside and see what was taking especially long with my family, but Sirius called my name before I could go. "Pandora!"

I turned toward the direction of his voice. "How do you know my name?"

"Did you really think you were the only one doing some spying around here?"

"I told you - I have no need to spy on you and the strange things you might do alone."

"Who says I'm alone?" For a moment, the question startled me, but then I noticed the laughter in his voice. Laughter.

"Very funny."

"Why do you believe everything you're told?"

"I do not! I don't believe anything you tell me, for instance."

He scowled, and I was pleased with myself for causing him frustration. "I mean, everything they tell you. You believe everything they say."

"They?"

"Never mind, Pandora. But I know you better than you think. Possibly even better than you know yourself."

"Let yourself think that."

"Oh, don't worry. I can guarantee it."

Suddenly, I could hear a different voice calling, "Pandora?"

Not even bothering to wave goodbye, I headed toward the sound of my father's voice. A bit of guilt hung in the pit of my stomach for only a few moments; it wasn't as if he deserved it, a wave goodbye.

It wasn't long before the end of the summer holidays was approaching quickly. I spent more and more days out with the people I called my friends. It's as if we were trying to make the weeks last longer, by spending as much time having fun as we could. Nevertheless, our efforts were in vain, and we should have known. The days passed just as quickly as ever.

It was one of those few nights that I was not out at a party or staying over at a friend's. I had decided that it would be best to at least glance at my new textbooks before returning to school. Doing so just happened to be one of those things one must do alone, so that concentration is possible.

There was a sharp tapping on my window, and I assumed that it was simply from a friend, writing in one last attempt of persuading me to go out. When I turned to face the window, it was not an owl on the other side, but a boy. The boy who no one ever saw. The boy who was a disgrace. "What are you doing here?"

"I - we… we need to talk."

"Talk? You want to talk?"

"Yes. Isn't that what I just said?"

"Fine. Get in here. Just be quiet, alright? And only for a few minutes."

"Not a problem. So… why are you being so civil with me? Aren't I supposed to be the 'freak' of the wizarding world?"

So badly, I wanted to correct him. _Disgrace, not freak_. I thought it was best to not go there, yet.

"Because I'm nice."

He stifled a chuckle, "You're nice. How ironic."

"What? How is that ironic?"

"I'll tell you later."

"You are so difficult."

"So I've heard."

Unsure of what to say, I remained silent for a few moments, as did he. "So… you said you wanted to talk?" I smiled at him uncomfortably, hoping that he would return the gesture. The whole conversation was going rather awkwardly.

After a moment or two, Sirius was once again looking me straight in the eye, "Well… yes. I was kind of hoping that we could be friends, maybe." Afraid of inflicting offense, even if this was he, I refrained from all desires to laugh at such a statement. It was such a ridiculous idea that I couldn't even put it into words. What had Sirius been thinking?

"Er… why do you think that would be such a good idea?"

"Well, I know it's not a good idea, necessarily… but I'd just like to. I mean, I'm just so …bored all of the time, and so I was only thinking…"

"Oh, so all I'm good for, really, is to keep you entertained? Don't you have enough girls to do that for you, already?"

He stared at me in the silence for just a few seconds, and the next thing I knew, he was laughing at me. Just laughing, hysterically. "Pandora, what are you talking about? I want to be your friend. I don't want to shag you!"

Though I was lucky enough to be blessed with genes that didn't blush, I was still utterly embarrassed. And he was still laughing.

"Hey, well… you know… that's what it sounded like to me!"

"_Obviously_."

The next morning, I woke up, feeling slightly lightheaded. It was not a fairytale with light pouring in through the windows and blue birds serenading me. The air was cold, sending chills all over my body, and it was still dark outside. The night before did not linger in my mind like a dream, but was vivid, ever so clear.

It was hard now, hard to imagine, that the boy I had despised all of my life could be the same one who had laughed with me in my bedroom the night before.

I could hear a few house elves outside my door, polishing the floors, most likely. I had a secret fondness for house elves, though I would never have admitted it.

Looking at the calendar, I realized that I would be leaving for school in less than a week. I was glad to be getting back to school. School meant routine; I always liked routine.

I crawled back into my bed, feeling nothing but content – everything seemed to be going perfectly. Unfortunately, I would wake again in a few hours to find that I had been mistaken.


End file.
